Where Is God?

I've written a lot about my adventures here in Lito--the things I've done and people I've met. But I have not written overtly about God very much. I have so much to say and I don't know how to say it in a blog, because a format like this makes things feel cheesy and canned (who likes canned cheese? No one.)

I guess the quick run-down is: God plans well. I feel like I am in the right place. I am learning not only what I came here to learn, but I am also learning many things that I didn't know I needed to learn.

Since the Canadians have arrived, I have been praying with them and Angie multiple times a day. I am so glad that they treat prayer as a matter-of-fact occurrence that will unquestionably happen during the day, like water breaks. I need prayer to become second nature.

Today I prayed more than I have in a long time. I am glad that I wrote much of it down, because revelations during prayer can be like 'strokes of genius' that are inspired when they occur to you, but are completely forgotten later.

I don't need to catalogue my every revelation here. The important point is that God really is present, every moment, waiting to be let in. I wish I realized this more often.

O Cananda!

Today I met my first real Canadians! And they ate their first real Yankee Salad!

Martin is busy with wedding preparations, so the responsibility fell to Angie and me to welcome Dean and Louise to Lito. This is their third trip to Litomerice, and this time they will see Martin get married!

I was very glad to make a meal for other people. It was an opportunity to pay back the hospitality that I have been receiving. I was not able to repay the people who had been feeding me; I could only be useful by feeding other people. I guess you could say that I've had to "pay it forward".

I was so happy to cook for the Canadians because I now understand how special it is to have someone prepare food for you. Even though I have a kitchen and plenty of money to buy food, for another person to prepare it and take me to their home and serve it is an experience that goes beyond food. When I ate with Martin and Petra last week, everything I ate tasted better and more filling, because not only my stomach was fed. This experience is gratifying and humbling. Now that I know the feeling of warmth and love that come from receiving hospitality, I have been thinking a lot about how I will show hospitality in the States, when I am in my home country.

But last Sunday I had an immediate chance to pass on the love I had received. I was so happy to spend the afternoon making dinner for Dean and Louise. As I worked and laughed with Angie I thought of every time that I had traveled and felt exhausted and the relief that filled me when someone met me at the airport or offered to carry my bags. I wanted to give them that feeling after their long flight from Canada.

Angie and I made a great team. I planned the meal and manned the stove. She prepped, organized, tasted and made everything look so pleasing to the eye. I mean, look at that platter of mushrooms. If I had been cooking alone that plate would have looked like a greyish pile of gooey blobs. Not very appetizing. But Angie is a great lover of French cuisine, and I think she did an impressive job Gauling it up with our limited resources.

We had a great 'getting to know you' meal. Angie and the Canadians caught up on mutual acquaintances and I heard about Martin at his first English camp. I knew it was going to be a good week.

Southern Hospitality

Ok, I've had it. Enough. This ends now. I have been receiving obscene amounts of kindness from my Czech hosts. Although the point of hospitality is to graciously accept the love it represents, I am a Southern girl with lady skills, and I will pay them back.

Starting with boiled custard. You might say, "Kendall, this is an old recipe, without precise measurements, carried out by your grandmother and her intuitive knowledge of cooking. Why, you don't even have cups and tablespoons to measure with, just a large mixing bowl with graduated gram measurements on the side, and the word 'sugar' in 18 different languages. Maybe you should just buy your friends some cookies and call it a night."

I cannot accept this because 1., there is last Sunday's lunch to consider and 2., I found mayonnaise in the grocery store.

Last Sunday, the soon to be in-laws of Martin invited me and several youths over for lunch. We had lunch, then lunch, and at the end, lunch and coffee. I knew from prior experience to pace myself, but small portions still add up when there's coffee cake, soup, turkey, rice, potatoes, turkey, chicken, salad, fruit salad, nuts, cake, and coffee. At least there were many people around the table, so I was not the only guest who had to choose between gluttony and leaving the host with a week's worth of leftovers.

After lunch, while we ate more and drank coffee, we all chatted and relaxed. Sometimes people spoke in English, sometimes Martin or Angie translated, and occasionally I shared big gestures and simple phrases with the people gathered. Most of the time the group spoke Czech and I sat, content to listen.

The human ability to communicate is really something. Without any knowledge of the language, I could still feel like part of the conversation and understand the emotions being conveyed. When I laughed along with the others, I wasn't dumbly mimicking; watching eyebrows and hands and listening to cadence is 85% of what makes a joke funny. I really was amused. [Interesting side note: mute listening really relieves a burden for introverts who want to have two-way mirror type socializing. We can observe and absorb and not be expected to reflect. Fully passive and fully participatory. Cross-cultural communication in this way is really a revelation for introverts who want to be conscientious.]

Not only was I treated to after lunch eats, I was treated to an after lunch trip. Martin's future brother-in-law drove me and two girls from the youth group to Hřad Střekov, a castle that has been around since before William took a holiday in Hastings. His family footed the bill, with no contribution from us 'young folks' (? I'm not sure how I fit in...as old or older than all the youthes, but just as dependent) allowed.

The Labe Rive was a pleasant backdrop to view as we waited for our tour to start. We introverts are very attuned to and appreciative of events, landmarks or calamities that relieve a conversation burden from us.

The tour was as marvelous and educational as any romp through an old, old well-used place can be. Judging on body gestures and eyebrows the tour guide was excellent. She gave me an English write-up about the castle and let me hold a sword, so I would recommend her to anyone. To complete the day, we were driven to an ice cream shop before heading back to Lito. I had a wonderful Sunday, from the morning service with Angie's heartfelt translation of the sermon to the windy ride back, full of laughter and red sunbeams. But I also felt pampered to an obscene degree. I mean...geeze. Food, fellowship, castles and ice cream...I wasn't expecting this.

At orientation, we discussed that loaded word, "expectations", and how to prepare ourselves against the disappointment and frustration of unrealistic expectations, which are inevitably not fulfilled. I thought back to my difficult adjustment to life in England (where they speak English...) and Brock's difficult adjustment to western CZ. I thought of how much difference an attitude adjustment could have made at those times, and I tried to come to Lito prepared for bad accommodations, hostile, lazy people and food that could only taste worse if it were half-rotten. And what have I gotten instead? A private, comfortable room with windows that opens, delicious, hearty food, and people who could not be more generous and caring if they knew for a fact that they were entertaining angels. So here I am, here I have been for three weeks, ready to grin and bear it, while all my needs have been met.

When great expectations are not met, the disappointment is severe. But what happens when bleak expectations are not met?

All I can think to do is to make banana pudding and cole slaw. If I cannot keep the Czechs from stealing my heart, then I'll make them think they left their hearts in the Southlands.

If you were a sailboat...

My official job here is teaching English, but since no one is interested in learning English for several hours each day, I have a lot of free time to help out with miscellaneous ministries. Since Martin is in charge of the youth group, I have been collaborating with him about program designs. Martin wanted to plan an active youth group this week, since last week's meeting was more contemplative. I have not been involved in youth ministry since I was in high school, so thinking about ideas for games and biblical tie-ins is a stretch. I started thinking out loud, which was a rambling, painful trial for Martin, as he tried to politely side-step ideas like 'set up an obstacle course for the students to run blindfolded, so they can learn about spiritual blindness'. Wouldn't you want me in charge of your youth back at home?

We settled on Paul being shipwrecked in Malta as the biblical emphasis for the night. Our game--giving the youths supplies to make their own small sailboat--was designed more for amusement that theological illumination.

After sharing praises and singing, we began on the craft. Our original design included a large, shallow kettle filled with water and an over-turned bowl to serve as the island. Getting their paper boats to touch the island before sinking, against the onslaught of an industrial fan, was the initial plan. But it was a beautiful evening and twelve people watching paper in a kettle isn't very interesting, so we walked to the park behind Bethel, which has kiddie pool and fountain.

Going outside to semi-moving

water turned out to be a much better plan, and youth group was a huge success that night. We didn't have a very specific plan or very good supplies. The youths were just given a sheet of A4 (an earlier post explains what this is.

I can't get into it again, because it's an emotional subject) paper and told to make a ship. Once we reached the pool, Martin told them to get their ships to the middle. It was a pretty bare-bones set up, and it was outrageously fun. Martin telling the youths that getting their ships to the middle could be accomplished by 'any means necessary' lead to the Dolce Vita moment you can see below.

Like I said, the fun was outrageous, especially since I got to watch the glee on everyone's faces without getting wet. Journalistic objectivity demanded that I not go in that scuzzy water.

After the youths had fulfilled the assignment (?? I think that means 'after Martin and I had decided that the fun would soon turn into lawlessness') we returned to Bethel and read parts of Acts 27 and 28. Martin talked briefly about the shipwrecks that life produces and what we can learn from Paul. The rest of the discussion came from the youths applying their thoughts and questions to the text.

The night passed with talking, music, bacon flavored chips (!nomnomnom) and selecting music for Martin and Petra's wedding. Great night.

[And for funzies: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8hOwLap5Je8, "If You Were a Sailboat" by Katie Melua. It's a very pleasing clip, for your ears and your eyes :) ]

Blinds Touching the Signs

What a morning! Before beginning our planning and devotional session with Martin, I talked with my co-worker Anna/Angie about her recently finished (at 4:30 this morning) dissertation. Since becoming a Christian several years ago, Angie has developed a calling to work with visually impaired children. Her dissertation involves techniques for both teaching VI children and integrating them into regular classes, policy proposals for VI curriculum, and evaluations of her classroom materials, based on surveys giving to VI child who tried the materials.

She showed me her very beautifully bound volume, which was filled with exercises that she has designed. I am so happy for the children that Angie will teach, because she has an incredible level of energy for this population and has developed very creative approaches to make learning accessible for them.

My favorite activity that she had developed gave both seeing and VI children a fun way to learn Czech homonyms. Angie picked a series of homonym pairs that contained at least one word that represents a tangible thing.

On a piece of paper, Angie wrote in both large, bold letters and in braille a cute, short statement involving one homonym. The other homonym was represented by the actual object, glued to the piece of paper.

For example, the word for snowflake is the same as the word for a piece of oatmeal (vločky). Glued to the statement about snow falling from the sky was a little matchbox filled with oats.

All sorts of homonyms, like mushroom/sponge, paw/pillow, and shark/a shoe so old the sole has separated from the toe, making the shoe look like it has a jaw, were represented with a tactile element.

She also spent three months creating a three dimensional book that depicts a popular Czech fairytale. Every page is written in braille, and every illustration is a fully-interactive felt, bark, carboard, wax, bead, and elastic work of art. Any child, blind or otherwise, can interact with this book with more sense than just sight. And what am I saying 'child' for? I had an awesome time touching everything too. My favorite character was the stretch man, whose superpower was, if you can guess, stretching. Angie had sewed his felt clothes to an elastic base, so that children (or adults who, like me, were exploring tactile learning solely for professional edification) could tug and stretch him.

If integrating classrooms can bring more materials like this into schools, what are we waiting for? What child wouldn't want to read a book that they get to touch allover and tug on?

And an interesting side note: today Martin talked about the 'kitchen robot' he will get at his upcoming wedding. While I started imaging what this crazy invention could do in a kitchen, Martin clarified that it was their word for a blender. I was relieved and disappointed.

Minikamp!

Exciting things are coming up at Bethel! Next week we will host a minicamp in the afternoons, to give adults intensive English practice. An older couple from Canada will be running the camp. They are coming in from Canada on Sunday, giving us a day to prepare before classes begin on Monday at 4 pm. After the progress made in classes this week, both by me and by the students, I am so excited that Bethel can offer this intensive practice and that I get to be a part of! The Canadian couple has lots of experience putting on camps, and the wife is an English teacher who has all sorts of resources. I have had a good time getting my feet wet on my own, but I will also be very glad to be guided by a real teacher. I know that I will learn a lot next week. Please pray for the success of the camp--that participants will be engaged, have fun and learn, that we at Bethel will be both effective teachers and witnesses, and that we can create a fun environment that is conducive to both learning and fellowship.

I am so happy to be here at Bethel, learning and experiencing. Thank you so much for your support!

We Need To Talk

For the second night in a row, I was very surprised that I was able to conduct a competent lesson. Last night I led an intermediate level conversation class, which went very well.

After a little prompting from silly questions I had written on the board, the students began to talk quite freely and openly. This was very exciting for me, because a conversation class is mostly impossible without vocal students. The very nature of a conversation class has made it hard for me to grasp what my role should be as facilitator. If the class is meant to be a place for students to practice speaking and listening in English, what purpose do I serve? I have to remind myself every few minutes that the time in class is the only chance these students have to interact with a native speaker. In a town this size there are few Anglos, and TV programs are aired in Czech, Slovak, German and Hungarian, but not English. Unless students buy American DVDs or scour the internet to find sitcoms, their chances to encounter native, natural English are rare.

Most of the conversation was natural. I occasionally answered a few grammatical questions, like how to use "me neither" (or, "neither have I", for more proper situations). Making these explanations throws me off at first, and I usually look blankly at the ceiling for a bit before I even understand the concept that is being questioned. For example, last week I tried to explain the difference between "borrow" and "lend", which is more difficult than you would think.

Example:

-A: Can I borrow that? B: Yes, you can borrow that.

[is the same as saying]

-A: Can you lend me that? B: Yes, I can lend you that.

The words cannot be explained only by saying that the lender uses the word "lend" and the borrower uses the word "borrow", since either person can use the word to describe the potential action of the other. And of course, I am trying to explain this to a Czech speaker who has been taught that the word "you" always means the one person being talked to, not a general "you" to apply to anyone in this situation. Therefore, I had to do verbal backflips to keep from saying "you only use 'borrow' when...", because the student would not have expanded the "you" to be anyone using the words in any situation. Confusing? I'm sure. But I still think this is so much fun. I love the ambiguity of grammar. Because it's not really ambiguous at all, is it?

Luckily, before I had thrown around too many "you do this when that, if here is there", I belatedly realized that I had a whiteboard. Through stick figures and multicolored highlighting, I was able to show the concept visually, and the student understood. Altogether, this process was nearly 12 minutes of explaining the difference between two words that a native speaker automatically differentiates. Just two little words. And it wasn't even something as complicated as "lay and lie" or "effect and affect". Wow. And yet other concepts that I would think would be very difficult the students seem to effortlessly pick up.

Just as my students are learning, I am learning as well, and I have been using the whiteboard to greater effect in my classes this week. After I asked a question last night, I then wrote it on the board so that the students could continually refer to it. (Fun note for people exploring ESL teaching: the literature that I read before coming to CZ advocated speaking to students before writing the words on the board. Any guesses why? Two reasons. One: how do children learn their first language? By listening for a long time, then speaking. How do they learn to read? By hearing the words, then by seeing them. What works for first language [L1] acquisition tends to work for second language [L2] as well. Second reason: English has a crazy alphabet. One sound is represented by several letters [c and k, for example], and one letter makes several sounds [see and sugar]. If something you are saying is already written on the board, chances are students will be looking at the board, trying to match the sounds you are making with the letters, and getting very confused because sounds and letters matching is practically an accident in English. This process will distract students to such a degree that they will miss what you are saying.)

We talked about Czech reality TV, the American obsession with medical and legal shows and interesting places we had traveled to. I also heard their opinions about Vinnetou, a classic Czech film about American Indians. A student had told me about this movie last week, and I was so surprised that European films had been made about America's Wild West that she brought in a copy for me to look at. As was explained to me later, during the Communist rule before 1989, Western culture was strictly censored in Czechoslovakia. The only way that the Czechs and others behind the Iron Curtain could encounter Western motifs was if they created them on their own. This confirms what a teacher in one of my classes told me last week, that the older generation of Czechs still admire the US, because it was sort of a gold standard of progress and fairness during the oppressive Communist regime.

Vinnetou is apparently an enduring classic, because all five students loved the film and all of their children loved it as well. I am looking forward to watching it, even though it's only in Czech and German. I think I will burn a copy to my computer and get Brock to practice his German by translating it :) The film was lent to me so that I can see the beautiful Croatian landscape that was used as a background, so I'm sure my eyes will be pleased, even if my ears don't understand :)

Last night's class was also wonderful because one of the students provided a Christian witness during the conversation. She is a church employee who is attending the classes to improve her English. While we discussed places that we had been, she talked about becoming a Christian while living in the Middle East with her Muslim husband. She shared with the group that even though her circumstances rapidly changed while abroad, God was visible and able to work through the bad. I was personally gratified to hear her story, as an encouragement to me. I was also glad that a student was discussing this, since I am concerned about how to be a good witness without compromising my role as a teacher, because my responsibility is to provide this service to the best of my ability. Please pray for my understanding of this interaction between teaching and witness to increase.

And speaking of prayers...thank you for them. I have felt so empowered during classes this week. I feel both confident and competent, like I am actually helping students learn English.

At orientation, the student.go supervisors talked about our calling to be "the incarnational face of Christ" this summer to all of the people we encounter. But it's much harder to check yourself on fulfilling this responsibility than checking if your students understand present continuous tense. Or as Martin said, when you build something with your hands, you can see the progress, and it is instant and rewarding. But the deeper progress is invisible, often slow, always a gift to witness, but never a guarantee.

Blessed assurance, Jesus is mine. But sometimes I'd like the assurance that I'm doing this right.